Resetting The Clock At Menopause

Even as our time on earth grows shorter, we can gain an expanded experience of time.

We are having a conversation this fall in this newsletter about the spiritual side of menopause. We’ve found no better guide for this particular discussion than Dr. Cheryl Bridges Johns, a respected theologian who has explored God’s purposes in this developmental stage of life in her 2020 book Seven Transforming Gifts of Menopause: An Unexpected Spiritual Journey.

Our writing team is doing a chapter by chapter dive into the book. Today’s reflection exploring our relationship with time is written by author and speaker Sharla Fritz. You don’t need to purchase the book to follow along. We’d love to hear your thoughts on what Sharla has to say!

On behalf of the Sage Forum Team,

Michelle Van Loon

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The Gift of Expanded Time

One of the gifts I appreciate about my late adult years is the gift of more time. In my younger years, I needed to juggle work and childcare hours. Now that my children are grown and I’ve decided to transition to retirement by working less, I have the gift of more time.

That’s why I especially gravitated toward the chapter “The Gift of Expanded Time” in Cheryl Bridges Johns’ book, Seven Transforming Gift of Menopause: An Unexpected Spiritual Journey. I want to use the gift of expanded time well.

Johns opens the chapter with an account of Mary Hallaren, the first woman to achieve the rank of colonel in the US Armed Forces and the first woman to command a battalion of women sent to England during World War II. After the war, Eisenhower asked her to oversee the women’s army auxiliary core (WAAC), a move that would make women a permanent part of the military. Not everyone agreed. The House of Representatives “felt the cost of integrating women into the service would be prohibitive because when women reached menopause, they’d be worthless!” [1]

Thankfully, society does not view menopausal women as worthless anymore! Although we still face challenges about perceptions of women in later life, gradually we now receive more messages telling us menopause can be a time of renewed energy and activity. We can view our later years as the gift of expanded time—time that we want to use well.

Johns offers some useful suggestions about making the most of our expanded time. She writes about cyclical, linear, and “supermarket” time.

Using Cyclical Time

Cyclical time is like a circle with repeating patterns such as day and night or the changing of the seasons. Women are especially attuned to cyclical time because of monthly cycles of bleeding. In the distant past, the world lived on cyclical time, following a lunar calendar and needing to work during the day and rest at night. However, now we follow a solar calendar and technology enables work to happen 24/7. This can increase our stress. Johns encourages us to reclaim the gift of cyclical time with these suggestions:

1. Maintain regular sleeping, eating, working, and resting habits. Know your body and learn to work with its biorhythms.

2. Practice Sabbath. Take a day to rest from work, shopping, and unnecessary activities.

3. Pay attention to nature’s rhythms. Take time to notice the day’s sunrise and sunset. Open your eyes to the wonders of each season.

Using Linear Time

Linear time moves forward in a straight line. It has a past, present, and a future. Johns offers these suggestions to using linear time well:

1. Reexamine your routine. After menopause, we don’t need to live in cyclical time as we leave behind the rhythms of bleeding. But we may get stuck in old routines established in our years of child-rearing and not consider changes that could lead to a richer life. Contemplate the story of your life: your past, present, and future.

2. Revisit your past. Ask yourself questions like: How can I build on my past? What lessons have I learned? Do I need to let go of things from my past?

3. Clarify the present. Think about your life right now. Consider questions like: Am I in a good place? Am I satisfied with my job or with staying home? How could I make life more fulfilling right now?

4. Envision the future. Don’t live on autopilot, doing the same tasks and routines over and over again. Take steps to move forward and design your future.

Avoiding Supermarket Time

An interesting section of the chapter on time dealt with what the author called “supermarket time.” Supermarket time is like the eternal spring and summer of the floral and produce departments of the grocery store. Women may no longer be viewed as worthless after menopause, but society forbids us to age. We are expected to look like we did in the spring of our lives.

Johns encourages women to disregard this mindset. Instead, she says, “The question for menopausal women is not, ‘How can I avoid aging?’ It is ‘How can I age with health, wisdom, and inner strength?’” [2]

To this end, she encourages women to strive for authenticity in their fashion choices instead of attempting to fit in styles designed for younger bodies. She urges us to avoid the endless search for the fountain of youth in creams and procedures, but to stay physically fit.

I found encouragement in the chapter “The Gift of Expanded Time.” As women in our later years, most of us have more discretion in how we use our time. But we still want to use this expanded time well. As we pay attention to cyclical time by establishing healthy rhythms of activity and rest, we can live with vitality. Practicing a Sabbath draws us closer to God and provides a needed break from our work. By examining our past and present, we can take charge of our future by avoiding past mistakes and today’s ruts. We can reject the notion that women should not show their age, and instead embrace this season of life in dressing authentically and keeping physically fit.

Let’s all appreciate the gift of expanded time.

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[1] quoted from Tom Brokaw, The Greatest Generation (New York: Random House, 2005), 142.

[2] Cheryl Bridges Johns, Seven Transforming Gift of Menopause: An Unexpected Spiritual Journey (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Brazos Press, 2020), Kindle edition p. 139 of 227.

QUESTION: Sages, how have you seen the notions of cyclical, linear, and supermarket time unfolding in your experience as you’ve moved into menopause?

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O Lord, you who come to us in the fullness of time, may we not see the days of our waiting as wasted but rather as days in which we are becoming large with the life of God in us, we pray, so that our expectancy might be marked by a resilient hope rather than by an embittered sorrow. We pray this in the name of the One who arrives in the nick of time. Amen.

—From Prayers for the Pilgrimage: A Book of Collects for All of Life by W. David O. Taylor

Please join us for the next chapter in our discussion in two weeks, which takes a look at the way menopause can offer us true spiritual freedom.

Photo by Alexander Schimmeck on Unsplash

“Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom.” —Ps 90:12