When The Training Wheels Come Off

The mission of The Sage Forum is to encourage, equip, and empower women over 40 to mature in faith and grow in wisdom. We send out a newsletter at the beginning of each month focusing on a different theme relevant to women in the second half of life. In November, we’ll be exploring a subject that shadows us all during these years: grief.

The Sage Forum Extra! is a short mid-month reflection meant to offer you a word of encouragement. Today’s Extra! is penned by Sage Forum contributor Michelle Van Loon.

“…I came so that they would have life, and have it abundantly.” (John 10:10b NASB)

If you’ve spent time in Evangelical circles at any point in the last few decades, you may have heard invitations like this:

• Want to settle the question of where you’ll spend eternity? Just pray this short prayer.

• Want to learn more about the Bible? Fill in the blanks in this Bible study booklet.

• Trying to figure out the keys to have a successful family? Attend this seminar.

• Desire to receive God’s financial blessing? Give at least 10% of your income to the church.

I believe most of the people offering those kinds of invitations have the best of intentions. They want to communicate that faith in Jesus is simple and accessible to all. These kinds of formulas and seemingly fool-proof programs may serve the same role that training wheels do for a child who is learning to ride a bicycle. They can help steady the child while they learn to balance on two wheels and pedal without assistance.

Unfortunately, spiritual training wheel programs and techniques may carry some unintended messaging. They communicate to some that if they follow the formula, they’ll be on the fast track to the blessed, successful, popular, financially secure, healthy, happy life. The Gospel becomes little more than an inspirational self-improvement program: #myabundantlife.

In fact, the context for Jesus’ words about abundant life came in the context of a conflict he was having with some religious leaders who were angry that Jesus healed a blind man on the Sabbath in John 9. Jesus then goes on in John 10 to tell a pointed story about the sacrificial role a good shepherd plays in the care of his beloved sheep, contrasting it with the self-serving way in which a hired hand would do the job. In context, the abundant life Jesus promises his followers isn’t a life hack, but is based in the goodness of being in relationship with him.

When I was a new believer, I was eager to learn all I could about my faith. I was excited to listen to sermon series that coached me on how to fix my finances or have a happy marriage. I signed up for classes and Bible studies, dutifully doing my homework. I attended seminars and conferences. I gave. I served. I worshipped.

But when I encountered loss, trial, and suffering, I discovered that some of the formulas on which I’d learned to lean didn’t meet the demands of the dark, uncharted terrain I encountered. While I appreciate the assistance those training wheels gave me in the early years of my Christian life (and continue to value the core disciplines that were embedded in my spiritual “muscle memory”), what I needed most was a vision for what the Christian life looked like after the training wheels were removed.

This is the gift those of us who are in second half of life have to offer to younger people and newer believers. If you’ve journeyed with Jesus for a while, you have an essential role to play in the discipleship journey of others. You are uniquely qualified to offer an honest accounting about what it is really like to learn to follow Jesus once those training wheels are removed.

If we are moving toward maturity in our faith, our stories probably won’t feature many prepackaged formulas. The stories we Sages are uniquely qualified to tell include the truth about our spiritual journey that is marked by growth and failure, disorientation and purpose, loss and hope. But those stories will also highlight the ways in which our good Shepherd has protected us, provided for us, fought for us, rescued us, and continues to save and guide us. Those are the stories that help others know what abundant life looks like – and every time we tell those stories, serve to remind us of it as well.

Good Shepherd, I thank you for running alongside me during the training wheel years of my spiritual life, and for guiding and rescuing me again and again after those training wheels were removed. I am learning what abundant life truly means as I journey with you. Please give me opportunities to share what I’m discovering with others. In Your Name, Jesus, I pray. Amen.

To consider: Who might benefit from hearing the story of your faith journey after the training wheels were removed?

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