Sages, Why Bother With Church?
Why Bother With Church?
I suppose the simplistic answer to the question “Why bother with church?” is “Because the Bible tells me so”.
But does it?
In the book of Hebrews, the writer interweaves sections on the exaltation of Christ with exhortations on how we are to apply Christ’s redemptive work in our day-to-day living. In one such application section we read:
And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. (Hebrews 10:24-25)
These are the verses to which Christian leaders most often refer when considering the importance of church attendance, and the writer does seem pretty clear that as believers we are to meet together. This meeting together is also intricately linked with encouragement and spurring each other on in love and deed.
Church on a Sunday is the most obvious expression of that meeting together, yet I’m sure most, and probably all, of us have had times when going to a Sunday service is just too hard. While we hold to the sometimes guilt-imbued ideal of going to church, in attending we face not encouragement or a spurring on but rather the deepening of raw wounds or even a quenching of the Spirit of God.
If you are going through a period of church blessing (as I currently am) then thank God for it, be encouraged and encourage, be spurred on and spur on others.
However, for those for whom church carries deep wounds (which I still carry), can I gently suggest moving away from a linear interpretation of Hebrews 10:24-25. Modern, particularly western church with its multi-service, multi-site emphasis, and a not infrequent adoration of its leaders, is far from the only interpretation of “meeting together”. There are (hopefully short-lived) seasons when encouragement, spurring on, and the very protection of our souls may be found in such things as fellowship meals with other believers, in one to one or small group prayer and Bible study, in an outdoor service or in many other godly expressions of fellowship that are likely as much, or even more, like an Early Church meeting than church as we usually think of it.
In this month’s issue of our newsletter, Michelle Van Loon has some additional thoughts in response to the question of why anyone should bother with church anymore. We’ve got reading recommendations for those of you who are asking the same question, along with a couple of late summer media picks.
We are grateful for you, friends.
Rachel Campbell for the rest of the Sage Forum Team
My Answer To This Question Might Surprise You
Last week, a friend sent me one of those stories about why people don’t want to belong to a local church community. To paraphrase the Preacher of Ecclesiastes, of the writing of such stories, there is no end. More people are leaving than are joining churches of almost all kinds here in the U.S. and across the West, even as the church explodes in the global South.
By this point, I suspect most of us could generate a list about why people are leaving their local congregations. My own list includes many of the items named in the slide show my friend sent me, plus a few others, just for good measure:
Too much emphasis on political issues
Scandal fatigue
Lack of authenticity
Prefer personal spiritual journey/digital church participation
Overemphasis on financial giving to church
Disagreement with church’s position on social issues
Spiritually abusive/narcissistic leadership
Frustration with how church handled the pandemic
Lack of meaningful, authentic relationships
Doubts and questions
Too busy
Different priorities
Racism and/or sexism
Illness or caregiving responsibilities
No doubt, there are other items you could add to my list. Please feel free to do so in the comments section of this post.
With a list like that, it is a reasonable question to ask why anyone would bother with church. In this digital age, we can now curate our spiritual life via podcasts and church services that suit our preferences, seek out friendships with people we like and avoid the mess of seemingly unending church conflict, get involved in the areas of service to our local communities that are personally meaningful, and engage in Bible reading, prayer, and worship in the comfort of our own homes. Today, we can create the Christian experience we want, and edit out the things we don’t.
Some might challenge this bespoke approach to a spiritual life with the Bible verses from Hebrews 10:24-25, which Rachel quoted above. These verses have been used by too many pastors to shame encourage people to show up for Sunday morning church services.
When I was researching the chapter about the changing relationship midlife women and men have with the church in my book Becoming Sage: Cultivating Meaning, Purpose, and Spirituality in Midlife, I discovered that these verses were never meant to be used as a cattle prod. I wrote:
These verses emphasize everyday mutuality in our relationships as we urge one another in community toward lives characterized by love and good works, in light of the fact that the end of days grows ever nearer. One commentator noted, “The author is here saying . . . let us consider one another, taking into account and weighing our neighbor’s circumstances and especially his risks, but this with a view not to exasperating criticism, but ‘with a view . . . to incite them to love and good work,’ acknowledging honest endeavor and making allowance for imperfection.”
In other words, this passage is a reminder that it is our job to pursue meaningful expressions of fellowship whenever we gather with other believers. We remember that commitment to a local body of believers is the primary way in which these relationships are formed, as well as the place in which we share together in corporate worship, learning, communion, and service. But we must also remember that Hebrews 10:24–25 isn’t a goad to get us to attend church. It describes the nature of our lives together whether we meet at church or run into another believer in the frozen food aisle at the grocery store.
The writer of the book of Hebrews would likely be very surprised to find out how their first century words have been used to drive people to attend modern-day church services. They have never been about checking an attendance box.
I understand those who believe that the church is found solely in specific institutional or denominational structures that can “officially” offer the sacraments (baptism and communion, at minimum). But I believe it is important for all of us to remember that Scripture never describes the community of called out ones–the church–in institutional terms. Those words from Hebrews are referring to something much more all-embracing and organic in nature. They are about being the church. If we are followers of Jesus, we are part of the body of Christ–full stop.
In these days when many older adults are quietly exiting their church for lots of good reasons, I believe those words from the writer of Hebrews might be able to guide us toward a meaningful answer to the question about why we should or shouldn’t bother with church.
Finding a healthy congregation is for many of us more difficult than ever. If you are a part of a congregation you love where, thank God. But for some reading these words, the reality is that there simply may not be a functional institutional church option in your community. And frankly, the oft-quoted sentiment that “There is no perfect church; if there was, it wouldn’t be perfect once you walk in the door” is of no help. Most of us struggling to find a fellowship aren’t looking for perfection, but a community of other pilgrims characterized by honesty, humility, and a shared commitment to emotional and spiritual maturity.
It would make things simpler to go it alone. But the writer of Hebrews doesn’t leave us the option to isolate. If we aren’t able to find a congregation, we may find connection with others through listening to podcasts, gathering in small groups of like-minded friends for study, prayer, and conversation, serving in our communities, and committing to core spiritual disciplines like Bible reading, prayer, and worship.
I know, I know. That list sounds pretty much like the individually-curated option I mentioned at the top of this piece.
But there is a significant difference. One is about creating a menu of spiritual self-care choices. The other, the one commended by the author of Hebrews, is about investing in the lives of others, and allowing them to invest in us.
In fact, the only thing that distinguishes my two lists is the motivation. The former is centered on caring for our own needs and desires. Please don’t hear in my words that I am in any way diminishing those needs and desires. On the contrary! Your desire to stay anchored in faith is a good thing. In fact, it’s a God thing.
However, spiritual growth is often cultivated in community. Spiritual community is messy and uncomfortable sometimes, and isn’t always what we would have chosen for ourselves. It can be a gift, and it can be a bother. But we all need the iron-sharpening iron” of relationships. None of us are islands, and if we find ourselves without an institutional church home for a season (even a long season), we can flourish if our personal practices and preferences are oriented toward seeking expressions of Christian community, even if that community does not come in the form of a neatly packaged church building.
Let’s face it. We live in a time of great transition in the church, and not all of our institutions will endure, nor should they. We in our sage years will not live long enough to see what emerges from this era in the history of the church. Of one thing I am certain: Jesus didn’t come to create an institution. He came to invite us to join with Him in the community he’s been creating and refining for the last two thousand years.
Additional Resources About Spiritual Community
Church: Why Bother? invites readers to join author Philip Yancey as he wrestles with the same question we are this month.
A Church Called Tov: Forming a Goodness Culture That Resists Abuses of Power and Promotes Healing by Scot McKnight and Laura Barringer explores unhealthy church cultures. If you’ve been wounded in one of these toxic church cultures, you’ll find empathy and a possible path forward in these pages.
Author Mary DeMuth has been blogging about her own experience of church hurt and the search for new community in the wake of her departure from her longtime congregational home.
Good insights from counselor Dr. Allison Cook about how to process hurt from a bad church experience.
ThePerennialGen.com has a collection of posts about the church experiences of a number of different writers.
What resources would you add to this list?
July Media Picks From The Sage Team
[PODCAST] Come by Chance–This compelling production by the Canadian Broadcast Company profiles the discovery by several individuals that they were switched at birth in a rural Newfoundland community at Come By Chance Hospital more than 50 years ago. (MV)
[BOOK] Life Worth Living: A Guide to What Matters Most by Miroslav Volf, Matthew Croasmun, and Ryan McAnnally-Linz. A very good, but a bit heavy, book. The authors teach a popular course at Yale on which the book is based, which gives me hope. But in my opinion, It is particularly useful for those of us in the second half of life. (JA)
[BOOK] I Cheerfully Refuse by Leif Enger. This novel, by the author of Peace Like a River which I remember to be an excellent novel, is about a dystopian age to come in which reading is scarce, people forgot how to write, there are a few people in charge and the rest are…not, and drugs like Willow, intended to put yourself out of the misery of life, are becoming more commonplace. Rainy is a guitarist and Lane, his wife, is a librarian and encouraged Rainy to read. They are happy until disaster strikes. The book’s insert describes his travels as Gulliver like, and he finds that as he is piloting his little boat he comes across other people who think like he does, and in the end, he says, “I am always last to see the beauty I inhabit.” (P. 329).(JA)
[VIDEO-Netflix] The Man With 1000 Kids–This three-part documentary gives us a look at the effects of serial sperm donors. It is not easy viewing, as you may not agree with the moral choices of most of the people profiled in this provocative and troubling series, but it may spark some good conversation in your circles about the consequences for society now and in the future, as well as what it means to be created in the image of God. (MV)
What are you reading, listening to, or watching this month?
Lord, I acknowledge my need for other people. I ask You to lead me to relationships whereby I might grow in You and Your will might be fulfilled in me. Show me what steps to take to see that come about. –from Faithgateway.com
Photos by Andrew Seaman, Mateus Campos Felipe, Josh Applegate on Unsplash
Another Gospel? by Alisa Childers.
"Jesus didn’t come to create an institution. He came to invite us to join with Him in the community he’s been creating and refining for the last two thousand years." I absolutely agree. The most common reaction I have to church institutions is disappointment. I haven't been abused so much as disregarded. But I know that Christian community is important, so we continue to go to church with sadly lowered expectations.